True Confessions

CONFESSION WARM-UP

Here is an easy confession...my Boston Marathon sucked. If I am being 100% honest with myself, I didn't approach the race with the proper attitude. 

Yes, I was injured but I wonder if my injury was more of a symptom of my lack of focus and caring. I will probably never know. I can say that while I did remain consistent with my training, I was not very consistent with my nutrition and other habits that I maintained last year leading up to IRONMAN California.

Just happy to be done

Last year, I started the year with Dry January and then almost immediately began the 75 Hard Challenge which included among other things such as two workouts a day, daily photos, 10 minutes of motivational reading, lots of water, and no alcohol. The summer came and went as my training increased. When September rolled around I decided to skip alcohol again until after the race. I also focused on sleep and being consistent with my supplements. And it worked. I had a great race and I recovered quickly and completed CIM with a PR. Then I took a three week break and everything changed.

CONFESSION - SOMETHING WAS OFF

I took the three weeks off because I had read about how important it was to give your body a break. It was perfect timing with the holidays and by the time it was over, I was ready to start training for Boston. I found a Boston specific training plans and was chomping at the bit to get going.

However, once I started training, things seemed off. My motivation waned and my energy level was in the gutter. Could three weeks of not training as well as three weeks of unrestrained holiday eating and drinking be the culprit? I had no clue.

January was once again "dry", but physically it didn't seem to help. I dragged myself through the 30k Jed Smith and then switched to an "easier" (less mileage) training plan. I started blaming menopause, weight gain, anything I could think of that could be causing my apparent decline.

With Boston behind me, I switched my focus to IRONMAN California and told myself things would get better.

CONFESSION - SOMETHING STILL FEELS OFF

Three weeks ago I was ready to give up. I was mentally fatigued and questioning whether or not I wanted to do IRONMAN California. I had signed up for the race as soon as registration opened because I was still flying high after my 2024 finish. This year, after the race, I need someone to take my computer and phone away at least until the "high" wears off. The finish line is so intoxicating and the week following the race, reading all the posts and looking at the pictures just makes me want to do it again. 

I need to remember how crappy I am feeling right now!

In fact, I need to add personal notes to my workouts in Training Peaks so I will not romanticize the training process. 

"Run felt OK, HR stayed in newly updated zones. Started crying in the shower for no reason other than feeling broke down, sore, and tired."

Yes, there were tears in the shower because an 11 mile run kicked my butt. My ankle is stiff and tight every morning and if I don't move around enough I hobble around. However, it is no where near as sore as it was in Boston so I don't want to use it as an excuse. 

CONFESSION - I WAS GOING TO SETTLE

After the 2024 IMCA race, I realized I missed a roll down slot by one position. In my mind, knowing that the women would be racing in France in 2026 and that there were more slots allotted for the French course, I figured I would sign up one more time and go to the World Championships (if I had another race result like 2024).

Maybe this contributed to my lack of enthusiasm for 2025 and all of the training. I knew in my heart that racing in France was a concession. It wasn't what I truly wanted. I wanted to go to Kona. 

On top of that, I had Boston still on my mind. I had finally made it to the race I had wanted for so long and it turned out to be a stressful, expensive, disappointing experience. Traveling to France to race would probably be much, much worse. Why was I doing this? 

Then IRONMAN changed a few things. First, there would be no more split World Championships. In 2026, both men and women would be racing on one day in Kona. Second, the slot allocations would be changing. There would be one slot allotted for each age group and it would roll down only as far as the third position. If no one took the slot, it would be "allocated to the overall ‘Performance Pool’ of qualifying slots that will then be offered to the next-most competitive athletes at the same event." I now wonder how this would have affected by chances last year. At this point in time, of course, it doesn't really matter.

CONFESSION - I DON'T KNOW IF I EVEN WANT KONA

Even if by some miracle I qualify for Kona, I have a strong doubt I even want to go any more. Could this be why I can't seem to finish my book which is based on someone that really wants to go? 

After Boston, I have serious doubts about my "bucket list" races. Races that have become so big in my mind, more than what they actually are...a race, an event, another day on the calendar. In fact, I have been struggling with the idea that I even want to race period. This year, besides Boston, I have done one other race, the Jed Smith Ultra Classic (another disappointment). I am beginning to wonder if the race itself is just a means I use to stay in shape.

CONFESSION - I REALLY DON'T FEEL LIKE RACING

I love training. I love having a calendar to follow and a plan for the day. I seriously believe that if I didn't have some long, crazy race planned I would be planted on the couch eating potato chips and watching TV.  So far this year, I have only done two races, one of which was Boston. I have no intention, or desire, to do a "B" race leading up to IRONMAN California. I just want to get IMCA over and done with. This is not a good feeling.

At this point, I feel like I just sign up for races so I race a reason to train and to be honest, I don't really like feeling this way. Going to a race by myself is not much fun. I miss my tri team. I miss having a training group. My one glimmer of hope was when HS decided to sign up for CIM this year and mentioned maybe qualifying for Boston. The idea of a training and travel partner that would actually be doing the race made my heart happy. 

Terrible phone shadow, but I was so happy to be out training together

Race Report - IRONMAN California 2024

May 13, 2024 was the official start of my training for IRONMAN California. I decided to try something different and purchased the "ADVANCED FULL DISTANCE (50yrs+) 24 week Plan" by Steve Moody on Training Peaks.  After several months trying to get back into shape and recovering from a string of injuries over the past year, I wondered if I had the dedication or physically ability to do IRONMAN training one more time. 

Day 1 swim test

Over the next six months, I stuck to the plan as close as possible and only missed a few workouts. I also made an effort to work on my weight and nutrition (Hello neglected mitochondria!), something that I never really focused on for previous races. Honestly, I think this helped just as much as the physical training. By race day, I was 15-20 pounds lighter than when I did IRONMAN California in 2022. I had stopped drinking any alcohol for 6-7 weeks prior to the race. I also worked on my sleep hygiene so my body had a chance to recover from the workouts. I was feeling the best I had in years!

GEAR CHECK

I didn't buy a lot of new gear for this race but I did get a few things: 

• New tires (Continental Grand Prix 5000) and tubes for my bike (better safe than sorry)
• Profile Design Heat Shrink Bar Tape (I was tired of dealing with wrapped tape coming loose)
• Zoot Elite Aero Calf Sleeves
• Fresh pair of Adidas Adizero Adios Pro 3 (Why not? LOL)
• Silicone ear plugs for the swim (can't stand cold water in my ears)
• The Feed running hat

Running gear 

PRE-RACE

TLDNR: Picked up race packet at noon on Thursday (the earliest time), spent some $$$ in the IRONMAN store, dropped bike off on Saturday around 2pm, woke up a bit earlier than planned, ate what I could, did my bible study, headed to the race.

I was awakened at 4:00am to my phone ringing. I instinctively grabbed it and flipped it around to silence the alarm. Instead of seeing the alarm, which I had not set to go off until 4:45am, I saw a message from Ring. My mind was foggy from sleep (or lack of) and I struggled to understand why I was getting this message. I listened to the voice mail and realized it was my daughter's alarm. I sent a quick text asking if she was ok. She was fine and apologized for waking me up. I told her it was OK, and actually it turned out to be a blessing. If I would have waited, I would have been pressed for time.

FACT CHECK: It was actually 3:57am :-)

That wake-up call was the start of my new approach to IRONMAN racing. It was going to be a long day and I was not going to fret about things I could not control. If there was an obstacle or mishap, I was just going to roll with it. 

I got up, ate most of my oatmeal, sipped on a cup of coffee, and did my bible study. I thanked God for all the blessings this training season. I was feeling fit, healthy, survived the training injury free. I checked the weather and thanked Him again for the day ahead. It looked to be nearly perfect for this time of year. I wrote "Philippians 4:6" on my left hand as a reminder. 

"Don't worry about anything; instead, pray about everything. Tell God what you need, and thank him for all he has done."

(IRONMAN is a long day, and letting anxiety get the best of you can zap your energy) 

I had originally planned on leaving the house at 5:30am but since I was up, fed, and dressed early (wore my wetsuit pulled up to my waist), we left about 5:15am which ended up being for the best because traffic was S-L-O-W getting off of 50/I-5 and into the parking lot. I could tell that HS was getting frustrated by cars squeezing in a the last minute. I did some deep breathing and told myself that the worst case scenario would be that I had to hop out of the car and walk to transition, but I knew we had plenty of time still. I told HS "It's OK"...and it was.

Picture of the ball field from our stationary spot on 
the freeway.

To me, everything IRONMAN California is relative to 2021, the inaugural year, the year of the Bomb Cyclone. Compared to parking that fateful morning, today's slowdown was just a minor issue. Once we were in the actual parking lot, there were plenty of volunteers guiding the way. We parked, I grabbed my "Personal Needs" bags and headed towards transition. 

First stop...bike personal needs bag. It contained an extra tube and a CO2 cartridge (I had two tubes and 3 cartridges on my bike) but I figured better safe than sorry. I then dropped my run personal needs, I had an extra pair of socks, band-aids, and some Aleve. I really didn't want to put a good pair of running socks in the bag because I knew I wouldn't see them again. However, it didn't make sense, after all the time and money expended, to get cheap and worry about a pair of socks.

My final stop was my bike. I filled up the hydration bladder with Mauten Drink Mix 320 and gave my tires a squeeze. Everything was good. I double checked my run gear bag, shoes, socks, hat, running belt/bib. All good. Just to easy my mind, I walked to find my bike gear bag. Everything was still inside. I took a deep breath and went to find HS.

We walked in silence to the shuttle pick-up area. This year it seemed that there were plenty of buses. HS gave me a kiss and wished me luck. There was no point in him staying so we parted ways. I was alone in a crowd. When the next empty bus showed up, the volunteer asked that we all have our wrist bands showing and instructed us to go to the back of the bus and fill it from front to back. I watched in amusement as the first few gentlemen boarding plopped down in the first rows. So much for following instructions. LOL

SWIM

TLDNR: Crowded swim start made it impossible to get to the pace group I wanted. Asphalt walkway leading to the swim start was soaked in pee (kept my shoes on as long as possible), a little bit of nerves walking down to the water, cold fingers and toes but not for long. Remembered to go wide at the confluence. Great swim.

As soon as I stepped off the bus, I made my way to the area where the volunteers were collecting the day wear bags. I took out my cap, goggles and ear plugs and stuffed in the fleece sweater I was wearing. I put my wetsuit on the rest of the way and walked to the swim start staging area. As I approached, the staging groups moved into the corral and I could not get to the group I wanted to start with. I shrugged it off and just moved with the people around me. Eventually we stopped moving right next to the volunteer handing out timing chips.

I was surprised and mildly amused by the number of people coming up to get a timing chip. I assumed some had lost their chips since yesterday, but others simply had not picked one up (as instructed) when they dropped off their bike. Thankfully, IRONMAN does a very good job of trying to protect people from themselves and had plenty of chips available.

Saving the "race" day! Found this photo of the timing chip
lady on the IRONMAN California Facebook group.
Photo credit: Janet Kramshuster

 

Screen grab from the swim start video on YouTube
(Click HERE to watch)

The race seemed to start a bit later than expected and I didn't start my Garmin until 7:42am. Since I didn't get up to my desired swim group, I did have to make my way around slower swimmers through the first two thirds of the race. The river temp seemed very similar to 2022. My feet, hands and face were chilly for a minute, but I soon was focused on nothing more than swimming. I relaxed and just enjoyed the effort and the beautiful morning. 

As I completed the American River portion of the swim, I kept my eye out for the large red buoy at the confluence (where the two rivers meet). Last time I did this race, I stupidly swam towards the buoy and then found myself a bit downstream from it and struggling to get around it. This time, I kept wide to the right.

Each time I looked up to sight the buoy, however, I was shocked to see it appear to move towards me. I had to remind myself that the buoy wasn't moving, I was. Thankfully, I had plenty of time to move around the buoy (keeping it on my left) and into the faster, chillier Sacramento River. Besides the temperature change, I also noticed a change in taste (yes, taste...couldn't seem to keep the river water out of my mouth) and smell. It seemed to be a bit like oil or gasoline. Yuck.

The sun continued to rise in the east and I was glad I chose my mirrored goggles. Before I knew it, we were being funneled to the exit ramps. The swim, my least favorite leg of the race, was over.

Struggling to put my Garmin back on
(I wear the Garmin on the outside of my wetsuit and 
have to remove it to get my sleeve off)

T1 

The run to transition was much shorter than in 2022. The wet suit strippers were friendly and efficient. The volunteer struggled to remove my bike gear bag from the clip on the fence and I could feel my anxiety rise. Once I had my bag in hand, I relaxed and made my way into the changing tent. I sat down in a chair, stuffed a Maurten bar into my mouth and went about the quick task of putting on socks, bike shoes, riding glasses and helmet. I stuffed my swim gear into the bag and trotted off to my bike.

BIKE

The weather was absolutely wonderful! There was a slight breeze, but after the wind storm of 2022, it was nothing to complain about. I smiled and thanked God for the day in front of me. 

Plenty to smile about on this ride.

I completed the first loop a bit above my planned pace. This small bank of speed helped offset the slow down on the third leg of the ride. As I headed back out, the wind picked up. It was definitely stronger than forecasted, but no where near the slow grind two years ago. I again thanked God and kept pedaling.

I carried my own Maurten gels on my bike and started the ride with my onboard hydration full of the Maurten 320 Drink Mix. At the aid stations, I would alternate between topping off with water and then Mortal Hydration. I had been training with the mango flavored Mortal Hydration mix because that is what was supposed to be at the aid stations. It may have been. However, Mortal Hydration doesn't not make a bottled version of their drink, so what they handed out were water bottles mixed by volunteers. Some of the mixes tasted much stronger than others and were quite bitter. 

Speaking of hydration. I'm not sure what was going on today, maybe I drank too much river water, but I have never had to pee as much and as frequently as I did on this ride. In the past, I have not been able to go "in motion". Today, after seeing the lines at the first aid station, I decided to try to go on the move. Success! Let's just say that after 112 miles of peeing followed by water wash offs at the aid stations, I was thankful that I packed a dry pair of socks in my run bag.

Besides not being allowed in an IRONMAN race,
drafting could result in getting a little wet ;-)

T2

Looking back, I wish I would have hustled just a bit in T2, but it is what it is. I racked my bike and sat down to put on my running gear. I chomped about half a Maurten bar and made a quick pit stop at the outhouse. Time to run!

Something Different: No bungee laces. I gave these up months ago and the few extra seconds it takes to tie my shoes has saved all 10 of my toenails!

RUN

TLDNR: I ran. When I got tired, I walked. 

For some reason, I really like the first mile where you run out and back past Drake's "The Barn". I checked my watch frequently and worked to slow down closer to a 10 minute per mile pace. The last thing I wanted to do was crash and burn.

The course went "off road" a bit as it took racers under the Tower Bridge and out along the River Walk Trail to the turn around point. After mile four, I hit a bit of a mental and physical slow down. All of a sudden, the realization that I had 22 miles to go seemed to be too much. I told myself not to worry about it and to just keep moving forward. I had no idea what my cumulative time was and I didn't care.

Crossing the Tower Bridge
(This is a great viewing spot for friends and family)

The course back tracked and took us over the Tower Bridge to the American River Trail. I noted that the sun was still out as I crossed the Jiboom Bridge and was happy to think that this year, the photographer would still be there when I headed out.

Sun is still out and I'm still running (sort of)

The course also took us through Old Sacramento. There were plenty of spectators cheering for everyone. I loved hearing "Go 6-1-9" but it made me long for the days when our names were on our bibs. There is something about hearing someone cheering for you by name that really lifts your spirits.

The Internet had me a bit worried about the run course. I had read about people getting lost in 2023 on the run. Honestly, the "H" shaped course didn't seem that bad. The split between Lap 2 and Finish was pretty clear and I was happy to cross the half way point. The second loop went along like the first. I walked every aid station and hill. The aid stations were well stocked. My go to became chips, grapes and coke. I also had a couple of Maurten Gels (one with caffeine and one without), and a half a banana. I switched on my light (clipped on my race belt) as I headed out of Discovery Park the second time. I had less than 5 miles to go.

The last miles were a struggle. Even when I got to the point where I could see the Capitol and hear the announcer, I still walked more than I ran. I finally got to the finish line chute and ran. I tucked my glasses behind me and made sure my light was off (I didn't want to ruin the finish line pics LOL)

This feeling never gets old!!

POST RACE

I waited a few strides before stopping my Garmin. At the press of the button, the watch face lit up and I saw my unofficial time...11:49:26. I did a double take and wondered if I had messed something up. My "B" goal was to try and beat my previous IRONMAN California time of 13:53:57. Based on my bike pace, I knew I was going to be able to do that.  My "A" goal was to beat my PR of 12:26:39 from IRONMAN Vineman (2016). I was prepared to beat it by a couple of minutes if everything went according to plan. I never expected to beat it by half an hour.

I gathered my finisher gear and walked to find HS. He had been tracking me and let me know that I got 6th place in my age group. He was excited and so was I, even though I knew it meant I missed out getting an age group award by one spot. It's funny how the elation of a great race and achieving a time I never even dreamed of can change just by knowing that I missed an award by a minute and forty eight seconds. My mind was flooded with "what ifs". What if I ran a bit more to T1? What if I pushed a little harder on the bike? What if I hustled more in T2? What if I ran the hills instead of walk?

I reminded myself that my ultimate goal was to enjoy the day and I did. The weather was nearly perfect, the course was great, I challenged myself and I was successful. I ended the day feeling incredibly blessed not only to be able to do the race, but to make it through the months of training healthy and injury free. 

I love our post-race photos :-)

Thank you, HS for sticking with me through another training season!!

NOTES TO FUTURE SELF

I'm not committing to doing this again, but I'm not saying I won't. I achieved things at this race that I never thought possible. With that in mind, here are somethings I want to remind myself of "next time" so I won't waste any energy worrying about them.

• Don't start to freak out when the days leading up to the race start to get chilly. 
• 4:00am is the perfect time to get up on race day. Eat breakfast, enjoy a cup of coffee and don't skip your daily bible study. It will feel cool in the house at this time, don't freak out, you will not freeze at the race.
• Don't leave the house any later than 5:00am. It's ok to be a bit early. Remember that traffic backs up at the exit.
• Don't make HS park the car. Getting dropped off is OK, there is really nothing for him to do other than fight his way out of the parking lot.
• Figure out how to protect your neck from the wetsuit...the anti-chafing stuff doesn't seem to be working! (Gross pic below)
• Check your bike and gear bags and get your butt on a shuttle.
• Wear a pair of worn out running shoes destined for the garbage can to the swim start. It will keep your feet out of the pee.
• Before you head down the trail to the swim start, dump water in your wetsuit to help pre-heat.
• You will not freeze on the bike if the temp is 65 degrees. Relax. It's a sunny course and with all the adrenaline pumping you won't feel a thing.
• Enjoy the ride, watch out for potholes and wheel eating cracks in the road. 
• Try to run (even if it's slow) in between all the aid stations. You will be happier when you look back at your effort.
• Don't get bunched up at the finish so the photographer can get a good pic!
• Smile and take it all in!

The only thing that really hurt the day after the race.

Race Report - Ice Breaker Triathlon 2024

The 2024 Ice Breaker Triathlon marked the start of the tri season for me with my ultimate goal being to cross the finish line at IRONMAN California. As I write this, I think IM CA will be my last full triathlon...but we will see how the training goes. 

 

Pre-Race 

I woke up Saturday morning to rainy cold weather. It's not as if I wasn't aware of the forecast, I was. It's just that at 6:00am, looking out the kitchen window and seeing it, made me start to reconsider racing. I quickly told myself that staying home was not an option. If I chickened out of this race, IRONMAN California would be that much more difficult to get to the start line. 

HS and I loaded up my car and headed to Folsom Lake about an hour an a half before race start. TBF Racing had been very clear that, due to construction at the lake, there would be a 15-20 minute walk to transition. What went unsaid is that there would be a 15-20 minute walk back to where the swim start was.  

Check-in was easy. I had printed a copy of my USA Triathlon card and a copy of my drivers license and laminated them together. The lady at the registration desk loved it!! I took my numbers and had to go over what was what with the volunteer. This was my first triathlon since IRONMAN California 2022 and I was feeling like a newbie this morning.

After getting my bike and gear from the car, we started the long trek to transition...in the rain.

Transition is located at that white tent way in the background.

Transition
Credit TBF Race Photography

After arranging my gear into two large clear blue recycling bags, I made my way to the swim start. In the shelter of the restroom/snackbar building overhang, I put on my thermal swim booties, my wetsuit, my thermal swim cap and the blue latex cap for my wave. I was tired after struggling to get into my gear, but at least I was warm. That is, until I got in the lake.

Swim

I made my way slowly into the water, letting it first penetrate the booties. It still felt cold, but eventually, my body would warm up the water trapped inside them. I continued walking until the bottom of my wetsuit zipper was submerged and the icy liquid flowed down my backside and started to fill the legs of my wetsuit. Eeek!

Still contemplating my life decisions that got me here ;-)

When I was almost chest deep, I stopped. In my mind I kept hearing Coach James telling me to stick my face in and blow bubbles. Which I did, reluctantly. I know it's supposed to help, but it was so cold. Eventually, I pushed off the bottom and took several strokes. Cold water flooded into my ears and I remembered the one thing I forgot. My silicone ear plugs. 

I turned around, took a few more strokes (Warm-up done!) and went to find HS. Thankfully, we had put my tri bag back in the car so it wouldn't get soaked. I asked him to go and try to find the ear plugs and get back before the start. He made quick work of finding them. Yay! My ears were going to be protected from the piercing cold water.

My swim wave entering the water
Credit TBF Race Photography

The swim started. I didn't get in a hurry. I strode out slowly until it was deep enough to swim and then I just swam. It is actually nice with the ear plugs in because there is a serenity in the silence. It was also nice that everyone was so aware of their space and I was only bumped and slapped (my feet) a few times. I continued swimming, stopping every once in a while to see where I was at. My Garmin data shows a fairly straight swim (for me anyways).

Swim exit was almost as casual as the start! 

I am thankful I put a pair of shoes out, because it

was close to 1/2 a mile to transition through 

sand, rocks and mud!

Bike

Cold does not begin to describe how I felt on the bike!

When I got to transition, I stripped off all my thermal swimming gear and slipped on my helmet, the easiest piece of gear when you are soaking wet. I had a pair of riding socks, but my cycling shoes that I had just pulled out of the bag and set next to my bike were already getting soaked by the rain. I've raced without socks in the past, I figured I didn't need them now.

I grabbed my riding gloves next, knowing how cold and miserable my fingers can get. However, in what looked like a reenactment of the infamous court scene where a pair of dried, bloody gloves were tried on, I stopped before I got the first one on. I would just have to ride without them.

I slipped on a pair of clear riding glasses because I really hate water in my face and jogged off to the mount line. I have no pictures of the ride due to the fact that transition was so far away and there were no spectators on the course.

I opted to ride my road bike today. Unfortunately, the bike decided to act up and for some reason I struggled to shift into a high gear. I could downshift easily on a climb, but then I was stuck spinning for a while until I could get the bike to change gears...usually right before I needed to climb again. Anyone that has rode this course, knows that it is twisty, turny with lots of ups and downs. Having a bike that didn't want to cooperate was not ideal.

I'm not smiling, my face is frozen!
Credit TBF Race Photography

As I said, cold does not begin to describe how I felt. I was in my sleeveless tri suit, soaking wet, sharp rain pelting my skin at times. My bike does not have disc brakes, so I was very, very cautious. I averaged 14.7 miles per hour on this ride. I can safely say that is probably my slowest race ride average ever. Even at IM CA 2022, in the brutal winds, I still averaged 16.12 mph! So, due to my slow pace, I got to enjoy more time in the cold. 

I was relieved to finally complete the second loop and head into transition. I unclipped and struggled to dismount my bike. My legs and arms were so cold, they didn't want to bend or move as I directed. I gingerly jogged over to my rack and hung the bike. I took off the helmet and glasses and tossed them into the bag with some of my swim gear. I pulled out a dry towel and wiped my feet and took the time to put on a soft, dry pair of running socks. Heaven!! I slipped on my shoes, knowing full well that my sock would be soaked in minutes.

I then started cleaning up my space and putting some loose gear away in the bag. "Stop!" I told myself. "Do that later." I have no idea what possessed me to clean up at that point, maybe I was just delaying the run. I pulled on my running cap, thankful for the protection from the endless drops of rain and started running.

Run

The long run from transition.

Perhaps it was my freezing cold legs, but I felt fresh headed out on the run. My steps felt light and I just jogged along easily. I had grabbed my handheld water bottle with electrolytes in it because I didn't want to slow down at the aid stations. Unfortunately, the first time I tried to take a drink, I almost knocked out a tooth. I was shaking so badly that I couldn't steady the bottle enough to get a drink. Maybe things weren't as good as they seemed.

Since I hadn't studied the map of the run course, I was surprised when we ran past the standard turn around point and continued on up the hill. Even though I was freezing, the course was beautiful and it took my mind off of being cold. Actually, running in cold weather, even with rain, is 100% better than riding a bike in the same weather ;-)

I closed in on a female runner with 42 on the back of her leg. Some people had body markings, others did not. She told me to go ahead and pass her and I replied "That's ok." I was focused on just running and watching where I stepped, not racing. I wanted to get out of this race injury free.

Post Race

Eventually I crossed the finish line. I was so happy, but the misery wasn't over yet. 

Happy face, happy race :-)

I went to the car and put on semi-dry clothes. I should have packed a warmer jacket for post race and an umbrella but I never would have thought it would be raining the entire time. I also didn't expect that it would be so cold. This is April in California, right?

I had HS scan the QR code for the results. No sense standing around if I didn't need to. The results showed me placing first in my age group. We were going to have to wait. I got a plate of pasta from the post-race food tent hoping that it would warm me up. It was lukewarm and after a bite, I handed the plate to HS. The snack bar was open for business, so we headed over to see what they had.

It was warm inside and the friendly lady at the counter brewed up a fresh pot of Folger's coffee for us. I couldn't wait to take a sip and finally feel warm. As we walked out to see where award ceremony was at, I tried lifting the paper cup to my mouth. I started shaking so badly that I splashed out half the coffee. HS tried to steady my hand so I could take a drink. I am not lying when I said I was freezing.

The award ceremony seemed painfully slow but eventually they called my name and I stood on the podium by myself. The only other female in my age group was still on the course. I collected my award and started the long trek to get my bike and gear...feeling happy that I didn't sit this one out, feeling even happier that I was headed home to a warm bath!

Looking Forward to 2024

There were a lot of positive things in 2023. However, now that the racing is over and I've had some time to reflect, I'm ready to start thinking about 2024. What do I really want to accomplish next year? How hard am I willing to work for it? Will my enthusiasm wane in the coming months like it did last year?

Check out the "Last 365 Days" graph, the low point was in the summer
before CIM training started, don't want to get there again

This past year, there were several events where I said "Oooh, I want to do that race!!" and then I didn't sign up. Generally, I didn't register because I was feeling out of shape and overweight and I didn't want to make the effort. The event would go by, I would feel bad I missed it, and then life would go on. 

I'm In!

In an effort to keep my focus, I've already signed up for a few races, including a couple that I skipped last year.

• Dirty Duathlon (Jan)
• Jed Smith Ultra (Feb)
• Ice Breaker Triathlon (April)
• Folsom Swim Run (July)
• IRONMAN California (Oct)
• California International Marathon (Dec)

Outfit ready for the dirty duathlon

Other Potential Races

• Parkway Half Marathon (April)
• Tri for Real (at least one this year) (June)
• Urban Cow (loved this race) (Oct)
• Run the Parkway - 20 Miles (Nov)

My Goals for the 2024 

• Drop 20 pounds by the next California International Marathon. I honestly think my weight is holding me back. I think I could run with the 3:55 group if I still wasn't struggling with this extra weight.
• This goal works out to about half a pound a week for the next year. I do have a couple of interim goals to reach in terms of my weight.
• Keep track. When things start to go sideways, I immediately stop tracking because I don't want to know. Good, bad or ugly, I need to keep track of what I am doing.
• Get to 150 pounds by Jed Smith. Based on my weight this morning, that is a little less than 8 pounds or one pound a week from today (you do the math). 
• January 2024: Following Tony Horton's elimination diet from his book "Bring It!". I've done this in the past and it wasn't too bad. 
• I will also be participating in "Dry January" since it works with the elimination diet. 
• Start incorporating strength training at least 1-2 times per week. 

• PR at IRONMAN California
• My 2022 IRONMAN California time was 13:53:57 and my best 140.6 (IRONMAN Vineman) was 12:26:39, so somewhere in between those two times would be great.
• Finish my book
• 15 minutes per day devoted to the book whether its reading or editing.
• What does working on my book have to do with training you might wonder...well, it's a fictional story about a triathlete, so I'm hoping the book and the training feed off of each other :-)
• Dust off the blog. Haven't been writing as much as I used to, probably because there hasn't been anything worth writing about.

Becoming Bulletproof...Again!

It's been roughly 10 years since one of my triathlon club teammates, Anthony, first told be about Bulletproof coffee. We had stopped during a swim set and he extolled the virtues of this drink and then gave me the recipe.

"What? You put butter in your coffee? And oil?" I asked, somewhat stunned and a little grossed out.

The pre-blended oil slick is what I imagined :-)

In my mind, I pictured a steaming cup of black coffee with an oil slick on top. Seeing the look on my face, Anthony explained that it was actually quite good, just like putting creamer in your coffee. He talked about how good it made him feel and how much energy he had.

Since I was training for Barb's Race (a 70.3 mile women's only triathlon), I decided to give it a shot. I could definitely use the extra energy and since I drank coffee everyday, it wouldn't be too much of a change to add a couple extra ingredients. The issue became finding those ingredients... grass-fed, unsalted butter and coconut oil. 

I made a trip to Trader Joes the next day and found what I was looking for...sort of. The butter was spot on, but the coconut oil, was in a solid form in a jar. This was a far cry from the MCT oil I now use.

The next morning I whipped up a batch of Bulletproof coffee for me and HS. Wow! Anthony was right, it was like drinking coffee with creamer. After that, Bulletproof coffee became a morning go to. In fact, at the start of 2014, I decided to start a diet (my winter weight had climbed to a number I would kill to see now LOL). Bulletproof coffee was definitely on the menu!

The Book Project - Editing

Since I'm taking the rest of December off from any kind of structured training, I have lots of time (sort of) for working on my book. I'm following the Story Grid with is an editing method developed by Shawn Coyne. I've been reading his book, listening to podcasts and watching YouTube videos trying to wrap my head around what I am supposed to be doing (and I thought the Triathletes Training Bible got confusing).

Anyway, the first step of the editing process is to read through my manuscript with my editor's hat on. I am no longer a writer. If I find anything wrong, misspelled, lacking in details, I am simply supposed to write it down on a sort of "punch list" (to use a construction term) and go back and address those issues in my second draft. 

Here is my take on the first act:

1. Leaving Work - Fourth paragraph is weird. Check tense in this scene. Seems to jump around.
2. Change - Tara only baked brownies for Mark? What about Mason? Wouldn’t Mason eat the brownies? Maybe she baked a double batch, more than enough for 3 people. A bit short
3. Jan's New Ride - more info on what a flip turn is and what year round swimming is.
4. 500 Free - more on winning, why is it important to Tara? What do coaches talk to swimmers about after race?  Fix mention of one more year of high school swimming. Mason is supposed to be a senior.
5. Crunching Numbers:  Discuss how food relaxes her. Takes away anxiety. Should focus be placed on which events Mason is going to compete at? 
6. Mason’s Big Decision - Confusing about college brochures being out if he already picked school, more conversation/argument before Tara storms out. She needs to realize he’s serious.
7. Hiding at Work - Potential? Is this needed? too short. More discussion about her pain, disappointment
8. Depression - Good start, work on transition to summer swimming and Tara’s weight. This should be about her letting herself go even further than when Mason was swimming.
9. Talk to a Friend - Tara is finally able to talk about disappointment. 
10. Leaving the Nest - How did Mason get into school if he didn’t apply? Tara would have know if he applied. Need to review this and make sure school he is going to makes sense. 
11. Intro to More - Good, needs more details.
12. Research - Short, need more info about what she finds, cost of Jan’s bike maybe, swim equipment, etc. Tara will go from uninformed to informed. Worry about what Mark would think about cost.
13. Friend in Need - Tara pushed by Kim to do an activity for herself. Short needs more build up. Maybe Tara can mention Kona to Kim but being worried about the cost and what Mark would say when they are in the store.

I knew things were rough but not this bad.

I've gone through the entire manuscript making notes like this. Towards the end of the book, I knew things got a little rough and unpolished, but I found a scene with only one...that's right...ONE paragraph. I guess I left most of that one in my head. I also found a scene that was more or less the original blog post it was based on...pictures and all. 

Only one paragraph describing the  2.4 miles before this point!

Now on to the next step which is to boil my story down to a one page summary called "The Foolscap Global Story Grid". This is where it is getting tricky...trying to answer these six questions about my own story and filling out the form:

1. What is the genre? (I'm pretty sure it's a performance story).

2. What are the conventions and obligatory scenes? (If it's truly a performance story, I need the scenes listed here by Savannah Gilbo).

3. What is the point of view? (Third person, Tara)

4. What are the objects of desire? (Doing an IRONMAN, going to Kona???)

5. What is the controlling idea/theme? (Hmmm???)

6. What is the beginning hook, the middle build, and the ending payoff? (I'm really not sure LOL)

Here's what a Foolscap looks like, I've set one up in a spreadsheet. Fingers crossed that by the end of the weekend, I'll have it filled out and that it will make sense.

Foolscap which is the name of the size of paper, now standardized at about 13 × 8

The Book Project

Scrolling through my previous blog posts, I was certain that I had written about the book I have been working for the last couple of years. Looks like I haven't or maybe I just mentioned it in passing. Anyway, now that IRONMAN California is complete and CIM 2022 is done, I have the rest of the year to focus on my writing project. Yes, I realize that this blog post is another stall tactic on my part, but I'm hoping it will put me in the right frame of mind for editing my first draft.

In a nutshell, the story is about a middle aged woman who had lived vicariously through her son's impressive swimming career. She is thrown into a depression when he decides he is done with swimming. Through a series of events, she gets involved in triathlons and is hooked. She naively sets her goal on racing at the World Championships in Kona before realizing the physical requirements and perseverance required. Eventually she learns to feel pride in her own accomplishments regardless of the event involved.

Somewhat autobiographical? Maybe ;-) 

Working through my printed first draft

Story Stats

• Draft: First
• Word Count: 82,000+
• Scenes Written: 66
• Scenes Edited: 4
• Writing Software: Scrivener
• Confidence Level: -100

Scene 11: "Intro to More" 

Here is the one scene I am willing to share right now. It's a bit on the short side, but of all the scenes I've written, this is one of the few that seems to move the story in the right direction. Note that "Tk" means "To Come", it's written as tk because no other word in the English language has that letter combination, meaning I can find every reference with a search.

    "Tara leaned back into the brown leather couch and pulled the colorful fleece blanket higher up on her lap in an attempt to hide her uncomfortableness. The elastic band on her sweatpants felt tighter than ever and though she tried to convince herself that they must have shrunk in the wash she knew that the polyester pants were roughly the same size they were when she bought them years ago at her heaviest weight.

A single brown leaf drifted down from the massive Valley oak tree and landed gracefully on the wine barrel chair. The warm summer mornings had given way to chillier air and changing colors. The shorter days seemed to drag on longer than their summer counterparts. 

This had become a regular weekend pattern for her with no swim meets distract her. Mason was away at school enjoying the first semester of his freshman year and Mark was off golfing with his buddies. Tara had plenty of tasks she wanted to get done around the house, but she just couldn’t bring herself to start a single project. The scrapbook of Mason’s senior year had only empty pages. The kit she bought so she could prep meals and hopefully lose a bit of weight sat unopened in the cardboard box it was shipped in. She had planned to clean the grout in the guest bath and refinish the wine barrel chairs that sat dusty and unused on the back patio. So many worthwhile projects that could easily take her mind of her boredom but zero motivation to start a single one.

An image of the pantry contents flashed through her mind. There was an opened bag of jalapeno kettle chips begging her to get up off the couch. The spicy treat had a much stronger pull than her willpower and within a few minutes she found herself grabbing the bag off the shelf and then standing in front of the open fridge looking for a diet soda to chase it with. She found a lone can of Coke Zero hidden in the corner. She grabbed it and for an instance gave herself the option to put everything back and make a healthy choice. She turned on her heel before the idea became too shameful and headed back to the couch.

The cushion made a soft whoosh as she plopped back into her favorite corner of the couch. She covered herself with the blanket again and unrolled the bag of chips. With the opening wide enough to get her hand into it, she set it off to the side and grabbed the remote. Saturday afternoons were not a great day for TV watching so she spent several minutes clicking past commercials and paid programming designed to trick you into watching what appeared to be a TV program. Commercial. Click. Commercial. Click. News. Click. Commercial. Click. Hundreds of swimmers bobbing in the ocean. Wait.

The sight of all of the capped heads caught her attention. The camera cut to an underwater shot of the swimmers. At the bottom of the screen was the beautiful bright blue of the pacific ocean. It looked as if the legs were dangling in a Blue Hawaii cocktail almost like human seaweed. The swimmers all wore knee length sleeveless suits with a black band around their ankles. The slow motion filming gave the scene a magical quality as the mass of legs slowly churned the water in an eggbeater pattern. The camera cut back to an overhead shot and then focused on a cannon. Boom! The cannon fired as a puff of smoke shot out as the sun could still be seen rising up in the east.

The horde of hundreds if not thousands of swimmers started moving forward. An unsynchronized mass of arms and legs moving across the top of the water. Tara remembered their family trip to Hawaii a few years ago. The water temperature was magical, nothing like the chilly ocean she was used to visiting.

The announcer came on and started talking about the swim portion and explaining the distances involved in this race, the IRONMAN World Championships. Tara sat up a bit straighter and leaned forward as it to get closer to the action. This was the race Jan had told her about. She pressed the “info” button on the remote and saw that the program was scheduled for an hour. She figured she could spend the next sixty minutes or so watching this race. It was better than watching commercials. 

The show progressed as it went from showing the professional triathletes and then the age groupers. Race standings were interspersed between race footage with the most beautiful backdrop you could imagine. While the pro race was interesting, the athletes seemed almost super human. There is no way I could do that she thought to herself. 

What drew her in and kept her watching was the stories of the regular humans. Some had suffered personal tragedies. Others had tried so often to qualify that they had purchased IRONMAN lottery tickets in an effort to get the chance to race on this world renowned course. The faces on the competitors showed pain and struggle and determination. Some finished before the sun set on the Hawaiian island. Others finished when artificial light had to be turned on to illuminate  the finish chute. Heartbreakingly, a few did not make the final cut off at midnight.

As quickly and as inexplicably as her thought to grab the bag of chips, a strong, unexpected desire arose in her heart. She thought “I want to do that race.” Deep down in her soul she felt a yearning to race in the most prestigious IRONMAN in the world even though she had never done a triathlon in her life. The joy on the competitors faces when they crossed the finish line reminded her of how she used to feel watching Mason swim. She longed for that feeling again and would do anything to get it.

“Here comes Tk. This is his third attempt at finishing IRONMAN Kona in the 80 year old group. He’s got less than a minute to cross the finish line before the time cutoff,” the announcer stated in a very serious, hopeful voice.

Tara leaned forward, her pulse quickened. It felt like watching the last two laps of Mason swimming a 500. 

“Here he comes,” the announcer continued, the remaining crowd cheered loudly. “It looks like he is going to do it this time. Here he comes. YES! He did it!”

The cameras cut to a close up of the 83 year old competitor, exhausted but beaming. Mike Reilly could be heard over the event loudspeakers “Tk You. Are. An. IRONMAN.” The remaining, late night crowd cheered wildly.

Tk bent over in exhaustions and finally straightened as a grey haired woman ran to him him and wrapped her arms around him, tears streaming down both of their faces.

Tara finished watching the remaining moments of the program and wiped her cheek. She had never felt a desire like this and the feeling was strange. Everything she had ever wanted to do involved watching someone else do it. She felt lighter for a moment as the happiness of feeling like she had a purpose lifted up from her doldrums. The credits rolled and she grabbed the remote and started channel surfing again before nodding off."

Constructive Criticism Welcome

I am not sharing this snippet of writing in order to get any kind of false praise. I am also not sharing it so people can rip it apart just for sport. I am looking for honest feedback. If something I wrote is unclear or doesn't make sense, please reply below in the comments. For now, I'm going to get back to editing.